A Misguided Notion About Love and Hate

I was not planning on posting anything because I have so many things to do. So far, I’ve only accomplished the task of feeding my dog, finished my cup of coffee, a few comments here and there (all the while greedily consuming my brunch – leftover pizza from last night’s party). Add the fact that I woke up late – midday – had little sleep which was four hours, thirty-eight minutes and two seconds exactly. So I’m kind of the slowpoke today. Unfortunately, that did not hinder me from expressing a strong opinion of a friend’s status post on Facebook (I really should delete that account). I guess my body might be a little slow, but my mind is working coherently.

He quoted: “Why do people hate when in reality, all you need is love? All these people hating must have not experienced love or worse, experienced a little love, lost it and have become bitter. Love is not vengeful nor creates sadness. Love should be perpetual and unconditional.”

I agree with the first and latter part. Why hate when you can love? Why be vengeful? A perpetual and unconditional love? Is that not what our minds and heart always long to have (and do)? Is Jesus not an example of unconditional love? Have that not been preached to us at church over and over? I admire such optimism, and I am not saying it is impossible. But, I am a realist. I expect little, but hope for the best. We are just humans after all.

And hate? You can’t really hate someone you don’t love. Hate and love coexist. It is never one or the other. Just as there is pain, there is joy. Just as there is a tear, there is a smile. Just as there is sadness, there is happiness. Just as there is violence, there is a tender touch. Life is a balancing act. You can never appreciate one without experiencing the other.

I disagree with the conviction that the bitter have not experienced the worse. On the contrary, those who resent, who hated or have been bitter, are actually the people who experienced the worst their heart could experience. We can’t really judge the lives of others especially how much one can endure, or how they deal with their emotions. We all differ in many ways. But, we are all just human capable of strong and negative emotions.

And, to love unconditionally, if one would like to start, is not understanding a part of it? Understand the people who are hard to deal with, love the ones who are not easy to love, do not expect that of others, give, and never ask or question? Should we not be sympathetic rather than find faults? Is that not the idea of unconditional love?

If that is so hard to do (which is), why not just give others room to grow? They will not hate forever. Bitterness stems from pain. Should we not focus on helping others heal than question why they feel the way they do? Reach out and help. If we judge, then we are the ones misguided. Those who love profoundly should also understand other people’s pains.

For one who have experienced such pain from loving, I understand the bitterness. But I have faith, because that bitterness does not last long. I am merely explaining why hate start to sip through the heart of some people. And how that hate is trampled by love rather than judging.

I don’t have any intention of offending anyone who would strongly disagree with my blog, especially my friend who posted that belief on his Facebook. In truth, that post was what inspired me to write now. I would also love to know other people’s ideas, even negative reactions if they have better understanding of what I am sharing. I am open to new things. People with beliefs that do not alter somehow challenge me. If I am wrong, I don’t mind being corrected.


We can never judge the lives of others. because each person knows only their own pain and renunciation. It’s one thing to feel that you are on the right path, but it’s another to think that yours is the only path. –Paulo Coelho


7 thoughts on “A Misguided Notion About Love and Hate

  1. Pingback: Family Love | New Heaven on Earth!

  2. This is a good post and I can’t really find anything to disagree with. I like your reference to the teachings of Christ. The only truly “unconditional love” we will ever know is God’s love.

    And I can so identify with the opening of your post! I’ve had a couple of weeks now where my to-do list is much bigger than my energy (or motivation) to tackle said list!

    • You are welcome! You have great posts and I love interacting with other bloggers, especially getting tips and such. Also, I would love to take credit for the idea but I downloaded the picture via Google. Haha! Still thank you for liking it. :)

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